+6593 – Once again, she fell into a coma before delivery, so it fell to her younger brother to name the newborns. Traditionally, that job would fall to the eldest, but he had lost that privilege after naming her first set of twins Denise and Denephew. When she finally came to, she saw her brother standing by her bedside, holding her children.
“What did you name the boy?” she asked.
“Dixon.”
Finally, she thought, a reasonable name for her son. “And what is the girl’s name?”
“Dixoff.”
2022-08-06 06:05:08
[+6593] |
Why was I never told this?
There was also a young woman who birthed a pair of identical boys. But she was poor, underemployed, and in no position to raise them, so decided to give them up for adoption. She wasn’t even sure which of two men might have fathered them, so called one “Amal” for the Egyptian man and the other “Juan” for the Spanish man.
Several years later, her situation was much better: a good, well paying job; a loving husband; and beautiful home. She began thinking about the boys and finally hired a detective to track her sons down and see how they were growing up. A few weeks later, the PI returned, saying he had found only one despite his best efforts. He had photos of Juan returning from school, playing with friends, and coming home to his family. “That’s wonderful!” she gushed tearfully, “If only you can find his brother!”
“Come on!” he replied, “They’re identical! Once you’ve seen Juan you’ve seen Amal.”
I lost it at Denise and Denephew.
*searches dixoff on the subreddit*
*finds only this post*
Congrats on the original joke OP!
Dixon Johnson, yeah that kid is gonna suffer in school
Ah, a sequel to a great joke! I approve!
Next set was named Penis and Penisnt.
When Mrs Johnson had a third set of twins (boy/girl again), she fell into a coma shortly before birth yet again.
This time, the honour of naming the babies fell to her husband, Jay.
First she asked what he named the boy.
“Jason,” came the reply.
Then she asked what he named the girl.
“Jaydaughter”
Should’ve named the kid Sergeant Major..
*More twin births:*
A 75 year old man with all white hair is dating a 22 year old girl. His girlfriend is pregnant. After the birth he asks the nurse “Well nurse, how did I do?”
The nurse replied “You did great! she had twins.”
The old man responded “ A little snow on the roof and I still got a fire in the furnace.”
The nurse replied “ Well you may want to clean the filters, because those babies are black”
Personally i would have named mine dixon and dixdaughter but thats just me
I thought it was going to be Didaughter
Denise and Danephew was much funnier.
I nearly skipped this, thank you. Every time I used to mention my friend that’s called Denise, this slightly older new mate would always have to say something about ”De Nephew”, it was painful. Sorry, I digress, thanks, gonna use it. Peace and love.
Seems like poor Mrs. Johnson has got some serious medical problems.
Luckily it was only a mild coma and she just “came to”.
Mrs. Johnson was my mother.
Once…again? That escalated quickly.
So wouldn’t it be Ms. Johnson cause I mean if a Mrs fell into a coma then it would fall on the father I.e her husband to name the children.
Lmfaooo
When they intermarried, she changed her name to Dixin.
Damn, Mr. Johnson missed the birth of both sets of twins. What a deadbeat 😂
Another Bojo lovechild.
I always heard it as Dawon
And Daottawon
A worthy sequel to the original!
We don’t talk about Bruyes, either!
Dixdaughter
And that is why you chose the name before hand hahaha.
It makes more sense on paper, because saying it out loud would sound more like “Dixin”. Which would then make the daughter: “Dixout”
Then again, if it were Dixin & Dixout, would make more sense if the genders were swapped.
I knew of the Denise and Denephew version of this but never Dixon and Dixoff version.
Their first twins name must be
Denise
And
Denephew