First date as a trans woman! (The outfit ok?) he doesnt know…

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+865 – First date as a trans woman! (The outfit ok?) he doesnt know im trans, do i lead with telling him or when do i bring it up?

2022-04-04 00:27:23

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Comments

comments

34 Comments
  1. for safety i would tell them beforehand. i wouldn’t want a possibly violent reaction from them from seeing gender diverse features in person.

  2. Good work on putting it in your bio, but the best time to bring it up is when you agree to the date.

    The second best time is *before* you get in the car.

    That said, you look *great*, and I hope you have a great time and hit it off!

  3. You should bring it up beforehand, it might be a shock when you show up

  4. Well babe I’m gonna be straight up with you, you should tell him before the date while you’re still home. Over a text preferably.

  5. Reply
    C0ffeeCoffeeC0ffee April 4, 2022 at 12:04 pm

    Everybody has already given the advice that I would give so I just wanted to add that you look super cute 🙂

  6. Sis, not telling men that you’re trans before the date is how you get killed. Be careful.

  7. Omg I love your outfit so much!!! I’m honestly really jealous of your figure, you look great sis and I hope the date goes well :DD

  8. That’s how trans people get dead. Full disclosure. I mean seriously people. Don’t end up dead, beaten in a alley somewhere going on dates without disclosing first.

  9. You should try and see his thoughts and if he doest have any bad thoughts about trans people and he may ask why you asked or if you are trans tell em. Also the outfit is great.

  10. Reply
    allpraisebirdjesus April 4, 2022 at 12:04 pm

    Everyone said everything i was gonna say, so I’m just gonna say GORGEOUS and I hope everything goes well!

  11. Tell him before the date

  12. You look gorgeous! Definitely should message him before tho!

  13. Tell him who you really are, you shouldn’t have to hide who you are to fit in with””societies norms”” so to speak.If he walks away it’s his loss not yours.

  14. I feel like this would be quite confronting to learn about during the date.

  15. I see that you texted him so hopefully it goes well. Otherwise you look totally gorgeous! ☺️

  16. Reply
    Dazzling-Wolverine29 April 4, 2022 at 12:04 pm

    Cute outfit and nice figure, and the right time to tell is when he asks for the date. We might like to think it’s a more enlightened age, but trans-panic is still a thing and we still get injured and killed for it.

  17. I hope everything goes well!

  18. Holy God now i wanna shave my legs

  19. How did he take it? Also before anything happens

  20. wish we didn’t have to say but the comments urging you to protect yourself are valid 🙁 i wish you the utmost safety in all your endeavors in the dating world <3

  21. The outfit is great! Really makes your lovely legs stand out.

  22. I mean looks obvious

  23. Pur!

  24. You’re gorgeous girl but you should tell him for your own safety.

  25. Reply
    Ellieconfusedhuman April 4, 2022 at 12:04 pm

    You tell him before you meet, don’t be dumb be safe. No seriously be fucking safe above all things.

  26. Reply
    Idontwanttousethis April 4, 2022 at 12:04 pm

    I know it’s a bit late but please always tell them before meeting! Even if it’s the first thing you say on a date some still get violence and you sadly run the risk of being assaulted. It be nice to not have to do this but you need to put your safety first.

  27. You look gorgeous.

    But whyinthehell haven’t you told him already? Relationships are built on trust, even though there might be some debate about that within the lgbtqia+ community.

    You have worked too hard to transform your body– and certainly your soul–not to be absolutely up front about your gender identity.

    I guess I’ve spent so much time over the past three years outing myself and writing about my out self, that I can’t imagine that everyone doesn’t feel the same way.

    I do it to be absolutely honest with any person who expresses an interest in me (???!!!) because I don’t want to deal with any sort of emotional shitstorm that might result from hiding.

    There’s too much at stake by not telling him. It could put you in a dangerous spot if he finds out that you’re trans. Angry reactions to being misled are all too common.

    Look: there’s just no way you’ll come out ahead by not telling him. Who wants to go into what might be a really important relationship weighed down by guilt? Or, at some point later, real fear?

    Look. I know of a transwoman who’s been married to her husband for 50 years. She had her bottom surgery in the basement of a major Bay Area hospital back in 1972 because there were NO dedicated facilities.

    This woman has raised a family, has grandchildren, and has led ***THE LIFE.***

    She didn’t get there by pretending to be someone she is not.

    Be true to yourself.

    Please!!

  28. i hope it went well, and you look gorgeous <3

  29. Omg mommy

  30. YEAH! Get it girl!! <3

  31. Tbh most men would not want to date with a trans woman. You should probably disclose to see if he’s a rare one.

  32. You look very pretty! ❤

  33. Personally I’d lead with it – that way I wouldn’t get my hopes up during a great date only to get rejected later on.

  34. Bring it up immediately. Man

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